For military members, veterans, and their families, the unpredictable nature of military life can make establishing and maintaining routines a challenge. Whether it’s adjusting to deployments, moving to a new location, or transitioning to civilian life, routines often need to be flexible yet stable enough to provide comfort and structure. Routines offer a sense of normalcy, help reduce stress, and ensure that family members stay connected even during times of uncertainty.
In this article, we’ll explore the importance of creating and maintaining routines for military families, along with practical tips on how to establish routines that work for everyone, regardless of life’s unpredictability.
1. Why Routines Matter for Military Families
The military lifestyle is known for its constant changes, and these disruptions can impact the emotional and mental well-being of both service members and their families. Here’s why establishing routines is essential:
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Stability in Uncertainty: Routines provide a sense of control and predictability, helping children and adults cope with the uncertainty that comes with deployments, relocations, and the military’s demanding schedule. Knowing what to expect in daily life brings comfort and reassurance, especially during times of change.
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Reduces Stress: Establishing routines minimizes decision fatigue and reduces stress by creating a structured environment. Whether it’s a bedtime routine for children or a morning exercise schedule for adults, knowing what’s coming next helps alleviate anxiety and gives everyone a clear path to follow.
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Strengthens Family Bonds: Consistent family routines, such as shared meals, weekend activities, or nightly check-ins, foster communication and connection. These moments provide opportunities for family members to spend quality time together, even when other aspects of life are chaotic.
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Promotes Health and Well-Being: Regular routines around exercise, meals, and sleep help maintain physical and mental health. Consistent habits, such as morning workouts or set meal times, ensure that the family prioritizes their well-being despite the unpredictability of military life.
2. How to Establish Effective Routines
Creating a routine that works for your family requires flexibility, communication, and an understanding of each family member’s needs. Here are some practical steps to help you establish a routine that is both effective and adaptable:
Start Small and Build Over Time
You don’t have to overhaul your entire schedule at once. Start by introducing one or two simple routines, such as a set bedtime for children or a family meal at the same time each evening. Once these small routines become a natural part of your daily life, you can gradually add more structure in other areas, such as morning routines or weekend activities.
Involve the Entire Family
Involving all family members in the creation of routines ensures that everyone feels heard and invested in the process. Discuss what is important to each family member—whether it’s time for hobbies, study, or relaxation—and work together to create a schedule that accommodates everyone. When routines reflect each person’s needs and preferences, it’s easier for everyone to stick to them.
Create Routines Around Anchor Activities
Anchor activities are consistent, non-negotiable parts of your day, such as waking up, meals, and bedtime. Building routines around these anchors can help create a natural flow to your day. For example, you might create a morning routine that starts with breakfast and includes family time, exercise, or chores before everyone heads out for their day.
Be Flexible and Adaptable
Military life often requires flexibility, so it’s essential to create routines that can adapt to changing circumstances. If deployments, long work hours, or relocations disrupt your normal routine, be prepared to adjust without abandoning the overall structure. Flexibility ensures that routines remain a source of stability rather than a source of stress.
Set Realistic Expectations
When establishing routines, it’s important to set realistic goals. Life can be unpredictable, so don’t expect every routine to be followed perfectly every day. What matters most is consistency over time. Missing a day of exercise or having an irregular meal schedule occasionally is okay as long as the overall routine provides structure and balance.
3. Maintaining Routines During Major Life Changes
Military families often face significant transitions, such as deployments, PCS (Permanent Change of Station) moves, or the transition from military to civilian life. These major changes can disrupt established routines, but with some planning and communication, you can maintain a sense of normalcy.
During Deployments
Deployments can be especially challenging for families, as they often require significant adjustments to routines. However, maintaining a daily structure during a deployment is crucial for both the service member and the family members at home.
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For the Family at Home: Establish daily routines that provide comfort and predictability for children and the spouse remaining at home. Regular video calls, letter writing, and shared activities like watching the same movie or reading the same book can help maintain emotional connections.
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For the Deployed Service Member: Service members can benefit from having their own routines during deployment, such as regular physical exercise, reading, or journaling. These routines help maintain mental and emotional balance while away from home.
During PCS Moves
Relocating to a new home disrupts daily routines, but you can minimize the impact by maintaining certain familiar activities. Bringing favorite family traditions and routines to your new location—such as a special breakfast on Sundays or family game night—can provide comfort and help children feel more secure during the transition.
- Prepare for the Move: Involve children in the process by maintaining small routines during the move, such as packing and unpacking together or exploring the new neighborhood as a family.
Transitioning to Civilian Life
When transitioning out of military service, the shift in lifestyle can feel overwhelming. Establishing new routines is crucial during this time of change. Build routines around new civilian work schedules, family activities, and personal time to ensure the transition is smooth and less stressful.
4. Creating Routines for Children
Children thrive on consistency, especially in the face of the uncertainty that comes with military life. Here’s how you can create and maintain routines for children to help them feel more secure and grounded:
Bedtime and Morning Routines
Set consistent times for waking up and going to bed. This helps children feel secure, promotes good sleep habits, and makes mornings more predictable. Incorporate calming activities, such as reading together, to create positive bedtime routines.
Homework and Chore Routines
Create a dedicated time and space for homework and chores. Consistent expectations around schoolwork and responsibilities teach children time management and help them feel a sense of accomplishment.
Family Time
Carve out regular family time, such as weekend activities or nightly check-ins, where everyone can talk about their day, play games, or enjoy shared hobbies. These routines foster communication and strengthen family bonds.
5. Using Technology to Help Maintain Routines
For families with busy schedules or those dealing with deployments, technology can be a valuable tool in maintaining routines. Calendar apps, reminder tools, and communication platforms like FaceTime or Zoom can help keep everyone on the same page, especially when physical distance is a factor.
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Family Calendars: Use a shared calendar app, such as Google Calendar, to keep track of everyone’s schedules and routines. This helps ensure that all family members stay organized, even when apart.
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Virtual Check-Ins: Set regular times for virtual check-ins with family members who are deployed or stationed elsewhere. This provides a sense of routine and allows for consistent communication.
Final Thoughts
Creating and maintaining routines is essential for military families seeking stability amidst the unpredictability of military life. By establishing routines that offer structure, flexibility, and opportunities for connection, military members, veterans, and their families can strengthen their bonds, reduce stress, and build resilience. Whether you’re navigating deployments, relocations, or everyday life, routines provide a strong foundation for keeping your family connected and thriving.
Written By: HelpVet.net
Photo Credit: Canva
